Otherkin FAQ v 4.0.1 (2/8/01)

A trend in the community happens where about 30% of the people it could apply to find that the subject matter is true for them. So if you don’t agree with something in particular, in all likelihood, you are in the majority. That’s important to keep in mind as you read the FAQ.

A good example is: Are all elves physically or energetically sensitive to metal/iron? No. But perhaps as much as 30% or so are. It certainly seems to be a trend.

Some Otherkin who appear to have genetic traits from non-human stock seem to have a natural magickal protection which is either an illusion or minor shapeshifting which is called a “Seeming” in the community. ie: they Seem human.

In Otherkin Awakening, an individual reevaluates their lives in new and sometimes scary ways. They realize that, for some reason, they no longer feel completely human. Some may feel a new consciousness developing, with new thought patterns, new belief structures or new memories.

To some, this ‘awakening’ to a new life is a quick and complete event. Almost overnight, they ‘know’ who or what they truly are. For others, and possibly this is the majority, the awakening process is the start of a long process that may take years to complete.{edited from Starelf’s entry to the original FAQ}

For more information on styles of Awakening, please see: So, You’re Awake by Miaren CrowsDaughter.

The first thing you can do is educate yourself by looking at this FAQ and checking out the resources listed at the end of the FAQ. After that, you’re probably better off seeking a Newly-Awakened-Otherkin email list or contacting Otherkin in your area and getting some friendly support and advice. If you’re having a hard time, you’re certainly not alone.

If you’re questioning your sanity, that’s a normal part of Awakening. Our society tells people that elves, faeries, angels, dragons and whatnot don’t exist, so realizing you *are* one is bound to cause some consternation. Flashes of sudden, new intuition, precognitive dreams (or waking visions), and so on, may cause some disorientation, but they are not out of the ordinary for an Awakening otherkin. (For more on dealing with that, see the section on Doubt and Disbelief.

As the community grows, the chances of coming across people who were Born Awakened increase, as newly Awakened people are having children of their own. However, this is not solely a new phenomena, there are probably well-established communities out there of Born Awakened.

These people probably also have a Seeming (see also Genetically Otherkin above).

Some people have the talent to see or sense True-Forms, and some people can kinesthetically feel only their own. This is considered a mixed blessing, because it’s not always comfortable. Sometimes having these phantom body parts is fun or interesting, sometimes they get in the way. For example, people are referring to their True-Form when they complain that their wings are bothering them.

“True-Form” was coined some years ago and is a poor term for what it means, but it has stuck in the community. Another term that has cropped up is “Dire-Form”.

One area that seems to be unique to the otherkin community is that of seeing people’s phantom body parts or superimposed manifestation of their otherkin aura, often referred to as “true-forms” or “dire-forms” within the community. This ability is sometimes called True-Sight, or just Sight.

For many or even most otherkin, there are no special abilities; it’s more a case of seeing the world differently from others, having different reactions to things and noticing (or ignoring) things that others might not catch (or think are important). Being Otherkin is not about what you can do, your magickal abilities or special powers, it’s about the way you think and feel, and how you interact with the world and other people.

There are so many such abilities, benefits and drawbacks, that it’s impossible to cover them in this FAQ. If you’re having difficulties in this area, please seek advice and help from people in your area, or an email list.

It’s common amongst Otherkin to find Called Healers, Called Guardians and so forth. The community doesn’t claim to understand it yet, but there’s many similarities in the sense of obligation, even if what they feel obliged to do is different from person-to-person or type-to-type. Feeling the pull doesn’t necessarily automatically imply having the skill or abilities needed to fulfill the obligation, which is sometimes a source of frustration for some newly awakening Otherkin.

Even within the community, there is often someone whose beliefs may seem stranger than the average Otherkin’s beliefs, but the community has developed cultural policies not to attack individuals for what they believe in. It is also perceived as unkind to try to force someone to change their point of view to suit your own.

This core of respect in the community does not stop anyone from discussions and comparing and weighing and measuring experiences and beliefs. It should not stop you from being skeptical either. All we ask is that you allow each of us the room to explore our own beliefs.

Otherkinness is a phenomenon in which proof is very elusive, and often in the eye of the beholder. You are very unlikely to find anyone proving anything in the community. In return for your respect, you’ll probably find a lot of respect for your skepticism.

But even more importantly, agreeing with everyone else, and believing everything society does, are not the best measures of sanity. A far better measure is that of _functionality_: can you function as a stable, productive adult in the consensual reality?

For example, if you can keep a stable job, a roof over your head, keep up friendships, relationships and/or a social life, pay your bills, and generally behave like a functional adult (if you’re an adult 🙂 ), then it doesn’t matter whether you consider yourself a human or a creature from another planet.

On a deeper level, many otherkin find that identifying as such — identifying as an elf, or a dragon, or a vampire, or a pixie, or whatever — actually gives them *more* of a sense of stability in their lives and understanding of themselves. If it’s simply something you call yourself, then maybe you are just playacting. But more likely, you’ve found (or will find) that accepting and embracing your identification and your nature as otherkin helps you understand things about yourself that never made sense before. And if it does, then calling yourself otherkin may be helping keep you sane.

The best thing is usually to ignore those who ridicule you and they will usually find something else to do when they get bored because you’re not fleeing them. If someone stoops to the level of harassment in any form, however, take the necessary steps – including calling the police if necessary. Just because you believe differently than someone else is never a justification for harassment. It’s illegal. {Sileniel}

Try doing something creative to channel your energies, and pay attention to your life and surroundings and make sure you don’t fall too deeply into overanalyzing yourself and the changes to your life. A sense of humor is always a good prescription. Laugh at yourself the next time someone jostles your wings (if you have/feel any) on the street 🙂 Try to enjoy the changes.

Of course, if it’s really important to you that people actually know that you consider yourself something non-human, then you may want to come out of the closet to them. (See below)

It’s up to each individual to define their comfort level with what other people know about them. There are many people in the community who are in the closet about their Otherkinness and many others who are rather out of the Closet, and all in between. Talking to other people may help you to decide what level of revelation to others is right for you.

The best thing to do is to take your environment and your self into account when making this decision. You might want to think about taking it a step at a time with each person, presenting Otherkinness in a step-by-step manner.

Before you come out to others, please come out to yourself. Realize how special you are. Understand that after you awakened, you will seem different, possibly thinking and believing differently than you did before. Get a handle on these new feelings. Get as comfortable, as possible, with them. When you are happy with who you are, then you might share with a close friend. There will be some you will feel you can talk to and many you will not. You choose the time and place and person that will learn of your new life. {from Starelf’s entry in the original FAQ}

In the event that you feel something really is happening, try picturing yourself surrounded by a globe of white or golden light. This is a very common protective visualization. Then seek out some help from someone in your area or online.

Forcing yourself to have memories because you feel you “ought to” is not the best reason, and many people chase after memories for a while and are quite unhappy when they finally find memories.

Memories that you force back to the surface of your mind are suspect, possibly contrived, and if they are real, they may hit you like a ton of bricks because you weren’t ready yet.

The best thing to do in the absence of memories is to pay attention to what feels good and right to you in the here and now.

The LostKin Project is one place where the focus is on persons who don’t have memories.

The LostKin Project is one place where the focus is on persons who don’t have memories, and some things there focus on how to remember more.

People who remember traumatic memories may find they need counseling, professional or not. Sharing the memory with trusted friends and finding a good shoulder to cry –or shudder– on can help a lot. If you can’t find a person to share with, try writing it out to stop the recurring flashbacks that often accompany remembering traumatic memories.

Often you can find a message in the trauma, something positive that you can take from the experience. Also realize that the event is in the past and not happening in the present, no matter how closely you relive it.

Not all Otherkin have this longing, and to many, this IS their native home. Speaking to those types about the positive points of this world might help you to make the adjustments needed to be more comfortable here.

There are various cases where the spirit belonging to the body leaves, or a swap takes place, or both spirits remain in the body creating a situation where the person becomes a Host (see On Otherkin Multiples, below).

Other things to do is to go to Yahoo Groups and Google Groups and do a search on the name of the race you’re interested in, to see if any specialty lists pop up. Take a look at Otherkin.net to see if any race-specific links have popped up since the writing of this FAQ.