The Toes of the Gods
This is proof positive that I can peel oranges with my toes. I can also write with them. The last time I got truly drunk, I was told that a young lady was quite enthralled with me until she heard my voice from the other end of the couch, looked down, upon which time she became quite agitated due to what my toes did semi-unbenknownst to me. Needless to say, my toes had to go to bed with no supper that night. That is why I and my toes no longer get drunk.
This is a closeup, for those who are interested:
Bits of My Reality